I'VE MOVED!

I changed websites to http://ourhulmehome.weebly.com/ - where I am now blogging with my wife as well as posting updates about the mission work we are pursuing. Check it out!

Recovering Rebels - The Heart of David

            So, I'm actually going to attempt to start a bit of a blog series based around a lesson that is becoming very dear to my heart. Titled Recovering Rebels, I want to spend time briefly sharing how God has transformed my heart of rebellion over the last few years of my life. Not that I am perfect in this regard; nonetheless, I want to begin sharing some of the truths of what I have learned.

            This first post is especially for those of my generation who claim to be part of a "righteous rebellion." Let me start by saying that I used to take pride in the term "righteous rebel," like it was something to boast in. I thought I was doing God a favor by recovering various apostate aspects of his kingdom and calling them back to holiness. I know that there are others who have felt this way. I've broken bread with groups that believe that they are destined to raise up a new Christianity that throws off the bondage and religiosity of the generation of our parents and grandparents. Even as some of you read this, there is a fire developing in your gut that provokes such strong emotion as anger, jealousy, and bitterness. You gather with other groups of young people and forsake the advice of the older generation. You say things like "I love Jesus, and hate religion," and believe that our generation - those born in the 80's to mid 90's, are called to lead the church into spiritual revival. Been there.

            I'm not trying destroy destiny with this post. Actually, on the contrary I want my generation to actually walk into their destiny with the heart of Jesus instead of under the bondage of Satan. I believe that our generation has a calling to help restore the American church back to a place of passion for Jesus. But in order to do so, we must forsake the principle of Satan, which is rebellion. Instead, we must embrace the heart of David, which is a heart after God's own heart.

            I’m going to go into quite a few different aspects of this issue, but if you can identify at all with the previous paragraphs, I want to highly recommend studying and praying over the life of David. You see, David was called, similar to us, to restore a kingdom to righteousness, to be a leader, and even to deal with corruption that was present in the leadership of his youth. However, instead of using this as an excuse to set himself against Saul, who was the corrupt leader of that day, he actually continued to honor God’s appointed authority, who was also Saul, and submitted himself to the hardships that endured.

            This isn’t to say that David participated in the corruption of Saul, nor did he always honor the wishes of Saul, but he did not set himself against God’s anointed. He very carefully recognized that he must not walk in a spirit of rebellion. He did not curse Saul. He did not even celebrate others who attacked and rebelled against Saul’s reign, he actually punished them! Eventually, God himself dealt with Saul’s sin and fulfilled his promise to David. David was humble enough to be patient, though, and by doing so pleased God greatly.

            The issue I encountered as I studied David’s life was this: can there be more than one of God’s anointed? Apparently, there can be! They can even co-exist with the same calling, yet one has to submit to the other simply based on the order in which they were appointed. Does this seem ridiculous? It did to me. However, we must remember that God’s ways are not our ways; His thoughts are not our thoughts. Logically and emotionally, this idea can be confusing and frustrating (especially as a young person). However, biblically and spiritually, it is true and right.

            So from my ramblings of this first post, let me pose a few questions for all of us – no matter how old we are.

1.      Who might be an appointed authority that God has placed in your life to submit to?

2.      Do you believe that God will fulfill his promises to you? Or do you try to achieve them yourself?

3.      Is there a Saul, or possibly multiple “Sauls” in your life? Maybe this is a person, a parent, or an organization.

4.      In regards to any “Saul-figures” you may have identified, are you walking like David walked or do you wish for their failure and misfortune? Are you respecting and submitting to their anointing even if you disagree with it?

5.      Finally, are there others in your life that have a similar anointing, call, or destiny that you can submit yourself to? Are you willing to wait until God actually raises you up to walk in a position you desire or feel called to? Or do you attempt to achieve your dreams by circumnavigating people that have already achieved certain pieces of your dreams?

            Please feel free to comment with any thoughts about this issue. Maybe there is something you would like to expound on or something that particularly struck you. I have not walked perfectly like David, but I am praying that the Lord can recover what I have embraced in rebellion and set me upon a righteous path for my future. I believe that God can restore my generation to not only radically follow Jesus but also to gain freedom from the spirit of rebellion. May the Holy Spirit make this truth ever truer in our hearts and lives.

Alyssa's Beatitudes - Matthew Five from the Eyes of My Wife

These are the beatitudes, looked up in Greek and put into plain words by my beautiful wife. I read these and thought that her translation and commentary underneath was so beautiful, it should be put out for other's to see. Enjoy and be edified as I was:

1. Happy and well off are those who are begging and helpless for the life giving Spirit, for they are the ones that will have riches of the everlasting kingdom and the sonship of royalty and kingship dominion.
2. Well off are those that grieve and wail, for they will be called to be near to God.
3. Blessed are the gentle and mild in spirit, for they shall be a royal heir to good fertile land.
4. Happy are those who crave and suffer after a right standing with God, for they will be satisfied and refreshed.
5. Well off are those who are compassionate towards those who are undeserving, for they too shall receive help in times they are afflicted and destitute.
6. Blessed are those who are purified by fire -  clean and blameless - for they shall gaze upon God.
7. Happy are those who love peace and are pacifists for they will be named the offspring of God.
8. Well off are those who are run after and pursued and despised because they long after a right standing with God, for theirs is the royal power and authority and right to rule over the kingdom.

Compassion and passion. When the gospel is simple there's no reason not to follow it. You either do it or you don't. Love jesus.. love others. The poor don't have back up plans. They cant do it themselves. If you want to know the heart of God looks like... stop and love them. We have complicated the gospel. God said “sit and love.” I wanted to understand the gospel and Jesus brought me to the poor and they taught me about the kingdom of God. Will you stop, will you care? Will you be Christ's hand extended?

The Rock and the Sand

Jesus told a story in Matthew seven about a wise man who built his house upon a rock and a foolish man who built his house upon the sand. In this story, a rain storm came upon both homes - the house on the rock stood, while the house in the sand collapsed.

Over the years, I have heard many descriptions of being the "wise or foolish man" in which wise people build their lives around Jesus, go to church every sunday, and make sure to plan out their futures. But what did Jesus actually say?

In Matthew 7:24, Jesus prefaces this story by saying, "Everyone who hears these words that I am speaking and does them will be like this wise man..." What Jesus is telling this story for is to emphasize the entire teaching and instructions that he gives his followers in Matthew 5-7, commonly called "The Sermon on the Mount." But if we really examine what Jesus tells us to do in these chapters, are any of us living lives of wisdom that is "built upon the rock" that Jesus laid for us?

Let's examine some of these harder teachings, Jesus told his followers:

• Rejoice when you are persecuted and men say evil things about you.
• We are salt and light to this world, and we are of no good to it unless our good works cause others to glorify God in Heaven.
• Anyone who becomes and stays angry with another is in danger of judgement and punishment from the Kingdom.
• Do not offer an offering or gift to Jesus without being reconciled with others.
• Cut off things in life that cause you to stumble in your walk - especially those concerning fleshly lusts.
• Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.
• Do not resist someone who is doing evil to you.
• Do good in secret; pray in secret; give in secret. 
• Do not lay up treasures in this world.
• Do not become obsessive about planning for the future and taking care of yourself.
• Do not judge others without first being set free.
• Ask God, and he will give.
• A person following Jesus will bear fruit according to that relationship with Jesus.

Honestly, these teachings are the rock Jesus advises men to build their lives around!  But let's be completely honest, our culture does not teach these kind of things. We find excuse after excuse to embrace things that are easy and reject things that Jesus taught that are hard.

• "Our society complains, files lawsuits, and becomes afraid when the Church begins to suffer "persecution."
• Rarely do our "good works" result in men praising God - so it could be assumed that our good works are coming from our flesh.
• "How often do we stay angry and harbor bitterness over the smallest, meaningless things! "They didn't cook my food right, he cut me off in traffic." Especially when we have expectations of receiving service, "That church didn't preach the way I liked, the waitress was rude, or I had this client that....". The list goes on and on.
• How often do we go before the Lord BECAUSE we are angry with someone - his directions are clear! Be reconciled and then come to him! He will forgive as we forgive!
• Many men in women would admit that they have struggled in their faith because of things on the internet, television, or various other forms of things in the entertainment world. But how often do we freely surrender these things for the sake of walking rightly with Jesus?
• How much time do we spend praying for those who dislike us?
• How often do we seek to retaliate, seek justice, or "protect ours?"
• When you do good things, do you seek recognition from God or men?
• Do not store up treasures on this earth! But how often do we upgrade to more and more things we don't need or don't use! Jesus DOES care about what you have! I would venture to say often he wants us to have less of stuff and more of him! 
• 401K's, retirements, school-planning, insurances for everyone and their cats - we obsess over the "could-be's" of tomorrow instead of walking in the confidence of God's provision and supernatural love.
• Can we even go a day without talking or thinking about someone and all the things that could be wrong with them? How often is our prayer, "Search ME, oh Lord!"
• How often do we seek to provide for ourselves? Our wants? Our desires? Even our needs? Jesus promises to provide for us - do we often seek him when we want or need something? Maybe Jesus will actually tell us that we should not be seeking those things? Maybe he will give out of his love and abundance anyway! But maybe we should at least ask more because Jesus told us to!
• Honestly, if we are doing these things according to what the Lord says - we will bear fruit of them. In our lives, our joy, in making more disciples of Jesus... we should seek all these things and pray that the result of following would be tangible fruit! God's Word  bring increase!

I say all these things so that we may more rightly seek to build our homes and lives upon the rock that is the teachings and truth of Jesus. No amount of man's wisdom, planning, or will can negate the truth of the words Jesus actually said! So let us lay aside our agendas, our pride, and our comfort and embrace the Jesus that we claim to follow! Let us construct our homes in a manner worthy of hearing, "Well done my good and faithful servant!"

Faith - Where Rubber Meets the Road

                Now, faith is the substance of things unseen – being certain of things we cannot see. Faith is where the knowledge of God’s truth in our inner man actually rules over the rebellious nature of our flesh and pushes us to make decisions based on faith in the Word of God. Faith chooses to follow God into the unknown, not pre-determining fleshly issues God has promised to take care of for those who love him. Faith prays for miracles with an understanding that God desires to heal, not relying on a back-up plan of medicine. Faith causes you to chase down gangbangers to share the love of Jesus, believing that God supernaturally protects those who follow him. Faith releases loved ones to follow God into dangerous situations, having a greater care for the Heavenly Kingdom we are promised than the earthly life we have stewardship over. Faith compels us to live like Jesus – subjecting ourselves to necessary hardships – because we are compelled that the God we serve is greater than the fleeting pleasures of this world. Faith is not easy, faith is not fun. But the burden of faith is easy, and faith produces joy.

                Faith, in a sense, is where rubber meets the road. It’s where the convictions of the word of God meet the experientially realm of this natural world. The members of Hebrews 11 did crazy things by a worldly standard. But God does not call this unnatural, “Without faith, it is impossible to please Him.” If this insane living is faith, and without this insane living, it is impossible to please God – there’s probably a significant leap that many Christians barely consider. Truly, I tell you that this living is normal in the Kingdom of Heaven. The forerunners of faith before us do not form some great “hall-of-faith” we all pray and hope to join someday; they actually set a standard of living for following Jesus, they are our “cloud of witnesses!”

                From the foundation of the world, the enemy has attacked man’s faith in God. “Did God really say…?” Brothers and sisters: Did God really say he would heal you? Did God really say he would protect you? Did God really say that the poor of this world would be rich in faith? Did God really say he would pour out his Spirit on all flesh? Did God really say he loves you? Did God really say to follow Him you must die to your flesh and soulish lusts? Did God really say that we must seek first his kingdom above everything? Did God really say that He would physically and emotionally take care of us if we subject ourselves to hardships while following Him?

                Search the scriptures! It is God’s desire to do these things! The Word of God is not filled with questions such as: Did God really say? Listen and meditate on the Words of Jesus. Did anyone know God better than Jesus Christ? Is there any doubt in his words when he promises God’s protection and provision over his disciples?

                Dearly Beloved, I am a man that is subject to passions and lusts as we all are. When I moved into a bad part of town, I feared for my family’s safety. When I choose to do what I believed God was calling me to by not going to college, getting married, and moving to a new city, I was afraid that my family may not have the provision that we need. When I or loved ones have fallen sick, I have been tempted to believe God may not be able to heal – that I may need doctors. Or maybe that He didn’t want to heal. Beloved, if God didn’t want to heal you, why would it be within His Will that you seek out an alternative that only brings glory to man? I say these things to recognize that these feelings and fears are legitimate – and they will come up – but that you can choose to walk in obedience to the Word and Will of God anyway.

                Truly, this is a hard word for me to swallow. I struggle with my doubts and with my “did God really say?” questions. But the Lord has not let me down yet, and I don’t believe he will in the future! I have found that when I come to him with a genuine, child-like faith he responds with loving care and gifts from heaven! Let us walk in confidence, God did say; so obey.

Streams and Rivers: Encouragement to live like a Believer

                “Father, I thank you that you have heard me – and I know that you hear me always: but because of the people which stand here, I say this that they may believe that you have sent me.” –John 11:41-42

                “Truly, truly, I say this to you: The Son can do nothing of himself, but what he sees the Father do: for whatsoever he does these things I do also. For the Father loves the Son, and shows him all the things he is doing…” John 5:19-20

                “Truly, truly, I say this: He that believes on me, the works that I do he will also do; and greater works than these will he do; because I go unto my father.” John 14:12

                This is not just a good book. These are not just good words. This is the Bible. These are the Words of Jesus; the living Word; spoken by the Word of God. This is Jesus. This is the Church. This is your destiny.

                I have been astounded lately with the number of things God does through those that will read the Word, believe it in faith, and then die to themselves and follow Jesus! I may share some of my recent experiences in the near future; but for now I just want to share a dream and some encouragement to seek these things in your own life. This was my dream last night:

                I dreamt that I was walking before the presence of the Lord, when he spoke to me and said, “Josh, why do you doubt me? Why do you question my desire to perform miracles? To save those who do not know me? Go, obey, and see me.” So I went down to a creek bed that I thought was empty; imagine my surprise when I found some water in it! I jumped down into the water that came up to about my ankle and rejoiced in the Lord! He brought water where I did not expect it! But the Lord said again, “Wait, and see.” Suddenly, I heard a sound like thunder; far down the creek bed, water began to build and flow towards me like a tidal wave. I scampered. I tried to run back up the creek bed, but I couldn’t climb up the bed no matter how hard I tried to get away. Then the Lord said, “This is what I intended. Don’t be content with a creek, when my Will is like a River!” The river then hit me, but it did not hurt – it actually felt good!

                I am convinced that Jesus desires to release an exponential amount of blessing to those believers who will listen and obey his voice! More than they could even expect! I heard a word a while back that a sister gave me in which she said, “So many sons and daughters of God are content in eating crumbs from the table of the Lord when Jesus has a whole refrigerator of blessings he DESIRES to give them!” Don’t be so quick to settle for crumbs from Jesus – in Spiritual reality, we learn that EVEN the crumbs from the table of the Lord result in supernatural miracles (Matthew 15:25-28). Instead, believe that when Jesus said that his disciples would perform miracles actually MEANS his disciples will perform miracles! Let us die to ourselves, die to our soulish doubts, and believe in the Jesus of the Gospel!

                I am a normal man that simply started praying through these truths. It is no magic formula, no perfect combination of prayer and obedience, it is simply reading and believing the truth of the Gospel in your own life. However, as I have started to believe these truths, I have SEEN and EXPERIENCED Jesus showing up miraculously! When my wife and I ministered out of a heart to serve in our neighborhood, the Lord actually MULTIPLIED our food to feed all the kids that came to our front porch! When a gang fight broke out in front of our house, the Lord provided FAVOR for me to chase down and share love with the twelve-year-old leader of the gang! When a co-worker approached me with the sadness she felt about a dear friend committing suicide the night before, the Lord actually RAISED HER FROM THE DEAD and HEALED HER to show the depth of his love!

                Dearly Beloved, this is only the beginning. This is only the shallow stream waters that Jesus says not to be content with! Jesus wants to seek and save those which are lost. To break into the poor, the broken, the hurting communities and families of people; to supernaturally encounter them with His love; and to reproduce the same fruit in the lives of those that come to faith in Jesus!

                Jesus desires to use you, today. Jesus desires to speak his love to you; to give fresh revelation into your inner man. He LOVES IT when you ask for more! He does not think you are greedy; he does not think your requests are foolish. Seek to know and understand the Will and Timing of the Lord; but DO NOT be afraid to ask! Ask in faith! Ask in love! Ask according to what the Word of God has written in it! Church, let us realize our destiny is not to present a good, righteous standard by which we condemn the world; but to actually present the Will of the Father manifesting through the Kingdom of God in the midst of a broken and perverse people who will then turn to the love of Jesus. Let’s believe we are actually sent by Jesus to do what he did, what he wants, and what he is going to do.

Why I Left the Church

                I come from a lineage of men whom have had incredible vision for the church of God – men who have sought to take the gospel to the unreached of America, the un-churched men that are so often written off by the church. They have sacrificed pride, jobs, and their own emotional states to try to see the things the Lord laid on their hearts come to pass; but the dreams and visions they held to have often been rejected. When my grandfather brought the town drunk into the church and began to disciple him, the church rejected this act of evangelism – my grandfather rejected the church. Similarly, my father has often offered great tools, teachings, and discipleship to churches that have instead held to centrality, popularity, and legalism over the true, gospel living my father proposed. I have watched the church reject these men, and these men fight to follow Jesus despite the opposition they recieved. From a young age, I figured I would fight a similar battle in my own life.

                Surely enough, this pain began knocking on my door. When I talked about doing missions among the poor and unreached, I was often discouraged by church leaders who told me I was “too passionate” and need to “slow down.” When I started doing ministry with my un-churched peers, I was told I needed to “submit to the local church” and “bring in a qualified adult to teach.” When miraculous signs began taking place in the midst of broken teenagers, religious leaders of the local mega-churches rejected the signs, wrote me off as a cult-leader, and instructed me to repent and stop preaching lies. Don’t even get me started on what I was told after I baptized someone! I saw what my fathers who walked before me saw, and began to feel what they felt – betrayal, control, pain. I desired so much to be qualified before these esteemed men so that I may have a commendable ministry, but I could never sacrifice my convictions and submit to a church program I deemed the Lord had called me away from! I was tired of fighting, tired of attempting to qualify gospel living to the church! So simply put, I quit the church.   

                I had a vision once in which the Lord began calling me out of the church: I found myself sitting among non-believers – they were cussing, gambling, drinking, and doing all those things which a “good Christian” would not participate in. My spirit was stirred – I began to share the gospel with them, and they listened. I sat among them, I ate with them, I even participated in their conversations – but this opened a door for the glory of Jesus’ salvation to be revealed in their life. The scenario started over. I again found myself among unbelievers, but this time not a table, a whole room. I was sitting alone – but my spirit felt compelled to share the gospel with this group of unbelievers. This time, instead of sharing a story, I pulled out my Bible, jumped on my table, and started preaching the Word. A few came near, and listened to my story – but most continued with their lives – the harvest was smaller than that of the first scenario. Finally, the scenario again started over. I saw all those same unbelievers which I had previously seen – but this time, they were below me. I was up on a stage, looking down upon this large, sin-ridden group of people. Someone walked over and handed me a diploma, I stepped up towards the ledge, and dutifully preached a pathetic message of repentance. Not one head turned. The only response I got was the occasional jeer to shut-up and go home. The vision ended and the Lord left me with this thought – what kind of impact do you want to make?

                Every step I have taken further and further away from a spotlight on the celebrity church show has compelled me to take further steps into the surrounding darkness of what appears to be kingdom anarchy. I have not found many believers in this place, though I have found I am not alone, but I have found Jesus – and I don’t plan to go back towards that spotlight. The further away I get, the clearer the truth of the gospel becomes – and the more I feel the need for its centrality.

                But my original move away from the church was not wholly pure. Although most of my motives were to see the kingdom of Jesus come and follow my Bridegroom, my decision had fragments and sections of bitterness, anger, and rejection. Although I was doing house churches and foreign missions and encountering Jesus in a very real way, often even driving by a church building would stir up emotions that any wise man would deem unhealthy! I had not compromised, I had stuck to the mission that the Lord gave me – but I still felt the sting of betrayal and the ever-lurking presence of bitterness.

                Jesus, set me free.

                “Why should ye be stricken anymore? Ye will revolt more and more: the whole head is sick, and the whole heart faint. From the sole of the foot even unto the head there is no soundness in it; but wounds, and bruises, and putrefying sores: they have not been closed, neither bound up, neither mollified with ointment.” –Isaiah 1:5-6

                This is how I feel – stricken – watching the body of Christ rebel against Jesus. I feel that our fruit makes Jesus sick – much like the church of Laodicea from Revelation three. The whole head is sick! The heart, the very mission of God that should compel us to do Church, is growing faint! And this body… there is no soundness in it! It is broken, full of sores and wounds that have not been closed! I feel like one of these sores. I have dedicated my life to follow the head, help move the body, and help repair breaches that have been made – but this church bitterness and brokenness has left me feeling like a sore upon the Body of Christ! This game of bitterness and brokenness seemed never ending.

                But hope was offered: “Come now, and let us reason together, saith the Lord: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool.” –Isaiah 1:18. I believe that this is a promise for the church, but only for those of us who will recognize our sin, repent, and follow Jesus. Jesus wants to heal the church; he also wants to mobilize the church! The things that were joined with this promise were the conditions to give up a pursuit of riches, repent for our sin, and start dealing justly with the widows, orphans, and poor!

                From first glance, this seems to take me back to where I started – seeing what I feel like needs to be done, striving to follow Jesus, and yet running into resistance with those who should most support me. But I came across a beautiful, liberating passage the other day – John 15, “I AM the true vine, and my Father is the husbandman. Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away: and every branch that bears fruit, he purges, that it may bring forth more fruit.” Jesus is the TRUE VINE! He is the one who we all report to, without him, there is no life. And for all of us who dwell in him, if we are not following him, he just removes us. For some of us, that is a terrifying call to repentance. For others, it liberates us from having to prove ourselves before men, believing that we do not report to the hand or the foot, but to the head. And that the head will sever anything that prevents his mission from moving forward! We’re not called to flow in synch with the Body, but with Jesus, the Spirit, and the Head!

                I’ve got this issue. I feel I have this commission from Jesus; but for so long, I have tried to get that commission recognized from men instead of confirmed in the heavens. Jesus was rejected before men, but confirmed in heaven, and he accomplished the task he was given to complete! That really is all that I want – just to do the thing that God wants me to do and somehow not care about what men say about that! And the amazing part? Jesus did this without bitterness, without giving in to a spirit of rejection – he did it in purity, love, and grace! I’m no longer surprised that when I lay down my life to make a sacrifice for a ministry that is not highly esteemed in the church, many people are more excited about my death than my sacrifice! But glory to God, vengeance belongs to him! He resurrected my Lord, and he will resurrect me! I can be free from trying to qualify myself before men so that I can pursue following Jesus, but I don’t even have to feel bitter when they insult me! For once, I feel like I can move the way Jesus intended simply due to the fact that He is enough.

                I’ll finish with one final thought – sand. Sand is simply tiny rocks, hundreds of them, crushed and bunched together. Jesus told a simple parable at the end of the Sermon on the Mount about a foolish man who built his house upon the sand, and a wise man who built upon the rock. Truly, I say this to you – the modern church will often require you to build a ministry on many foundations that are not the gospel. You will be asked to build upon education, doctrines, age, experience, amount of people, number of books published, popularity, amount of souls won…etc. These, beloved, are sand. They are tiny, ground up pieces of truth that resemble the larger truth of the gospel but result in a foundation that is far from stable. Jesus told us that the greatest commandment is to love God and love your neighbor as yourself – and that everything else will be fulfilled if we could just do these two things. For so long, I have built a foundation that has been laid partly on the gospel, and partly on my individuality, my acceptance, my popularity, and my success. I’m tired of trying to build a church on tiny rocks, I want the real thing! I want Jesus! The Gospel! The love that forms this solid rock I can surely stand on! Let us beware of these subtle qualifications, these whispers of bitterness or rejection, these desires to please man – let’s stop playing church, and let’s follow Jesus.

                I’m in the process of being set free. Free from bitterness, shame, guilt, people-pleasing, rejection, and free to follow the convictions the Lord has laid on my heart. I’m free to follow Jesus, free to love God and love man, and free to quit the “church game” for good. May these realizations only serve in liberating the reader to serve Jesus without feeling like they must find a man-made avenue to do so – there is but one advocate between God and man, one avenue by which we receive our qualification, our anointing, and our voice – and that is Jesus – our Lord, our Savior, our King. Jesus is enough.              

               

The Pharisee Anarchist Debate

“The foolishness of God is wiser than the wisdom of men; and the weakness of God is stronger than the strength of men.” -1 Corinthians 1:25

                Pharisees and anarchists – these, are what I deem to be the two major sub-groups of Christian leaders in the modern-day church. One puts emphasis on education, one on relationships; one seeks to qualify individuals, the other believes all are qualified; one believes in apologetics, the other in emotions. You’ll find most of your Pharisees at your local seminary; while anarchists tend to start house churches and small groups – and although these two are brothers and sisters in Christ, there is, at times, so much tension between the two viewpoints that it seems as if this Heavenly family may split!

                Now, for the most part, house church anarchists and mega-church Pharisees get along pretty well – so long as they stay separate and don’t talk about their view points. Most people involved in the anarchist church movement are only slightly abandoned to the idea of traditional church education, leadership development, and organized Sunday-services. And most traditional church Pharisees are only slightly legalistic – believing in essential doctrines, program-development, and seminary training. Each side points out the flaws in the other – when one says, “You’re too man-organized and mind-driven to allow the Spirit of God to reign!” The other replies by saying, “You’re too emotional and ‘spirit-lead’ to have any foundational truth upon the Word of God!”

                Now, the argument is just a big game until the leadership gets questioned – then emotional wounds start to go deep. The house-church movement often accuses the traditional church leadership of being manipulative, controlling, mind-driven, and ultimately unfit to practice biblical Christianity. Even if these accusations are not spoken, they are often implied and thought – how worse of an attack can one brother wish upon another than that they would be unable to live out biblical Christianity? But the fault is not just on the brothers who have separated themselves from the traditional church, many leaders that have gone through seminary, organized discipleships, and other leadership-qualifying Christian education accuse house church leaders of being ill-prepared, under qualified, rebellious and unfit to teach and share the gospel message! Another damning attack that tells any uneducated Christian they will be unable to fulfill the great commission.

                Now, this argument often strikes chords within most people who have been at all involved in Christian leadership – and I’ve been on both sides of this argument – far left, and far right. Once upon a time, I was the guy that wrote papers on Baptist history, read KJV only, and disqualified anyone who believed differently than I had been taught in discipleship lessons. However, I migrated to the side that started disqualifying anyone who did believe in Baptist only heritage, KJV only Bibles, and thought that discipleship was necessary for church leadership. And I’m not even trying to say I’ve figured out the perfect way to go in this blog post, I’m just trying to resolve some of the conflict within my own head!

                Due to my fickleness in church crowds, I have found that both sides have a lot to offer the church. There are often a number of great resources produced from each side regarding church development, there are great spiritual truths that are grasped more fully in some circles than in others, there are usually movements to reach certain unreached people groups, and almost every church I have been to that isn’t practicing heresy is striving to accomplish the great commission! What more could you ask for? Truly, it is not the desire for truth and biblical Christianity that causes us to lash out against one another, but fleshly pride that believes we have found a more perfect thing. Beloved, did not Jesus say that there is only one good – the Father in heaven? Our ways are not, cannot be good! We should spend our time edifying, and qualifying one another! There are people who cannot be reached but for a house church, and there are those who cannot be reached but through the institutional church. God has destined each one of us for a purpose to accomplish, he has set us apart for good works, and he has qualified all of us as heirs with Jesus! Who are we, who am I, to tell a co-heir with Jesus that they are not qualified to work in the harvest field?

                Brothers and sisters, the foolishness of God is wiser than men; His weakness is stronger than man. Truly, if the Word of God tells us that the things we do in our flesh is nothing compared to the weakness and the foolishness of God – why do we spend so much time exalting our agendas instead of the cross of Jesus? Let us remember, in the areas we are weak and foolish together, but rely on the Lord, He will receive his due glory. Please, let us strive to encourage, love, and spur one another on toward love. Follow your convictions, listen to Jesus, but let us respect one another.

                Beloved, you are qualified to fulfill the great commission. It is not my job to tell you by what means you need to do so – please, follow Jesus and do what he says. If you are striving for something that does not work, seek the Lord in prayer, search the scriptures – Jesus has qualified you through his death and resurrection, surely He will also guide his church.

                Thank you, Jesus, that you love us enough to see past our exalted, pride-filled flesh. Help us to love one another the way that you have loved us, to die to ourselves, and to fulfill the commission you gave your Bride while you continued with us on earth.

Please, Don't Lock Me Out!

                Most of us have been here before: I remember riding with my parents as a little kid down into some of the worst parts of Kansas City – or should I say, through some of the worst parts of Kansas City. We would be driving along some road, coming up to some stop sign, when I would hear the all-too-familiar click of the car doors locking. My father would go on to explain how we were in a “bad part of town” around people who “do bad things.” I would then typically look out the window to see cold, stoned, drunk, poor, disabled, and different people standing at a bus stop – just living their lives. They looked scary. They looked weird. Some even looked like they might hurt me or take advantage of me if they had the chance.  Naturally, it made sense to lock the doors – I felt safer. I didn’t make eye-contact, didn’t play my music too loud – nothing to draw attention to myself from these strange, ghetto people.

                That was then… and through most of my life growing up. Every once in a while, I’d feel a tug of sympathy in some deep place in my heart - a little voice whispering, “That’s me.” But before I could follow the voice to its source, I was driving away, moving on, and those ghetto people would again be forgotten.  

                I haven’t given any of this much thought. I’ve moved on with my life – growing up, growing older, and growing in my faith. Jesus eventually called me to live among some of these ghetto people, to feel what they feel, and experience the troubles they experience. My wife and I don’t have much: we do our laundry at a laundry mat; I ride the bus to work; there's the occasional fights in our neighborhood; the occassional sighting of a drug-deal; and there’s quite a bit of foot-traffic – we’re part of it! Needless to say, it’s a different lifestyle. Living this way has been a new, interesting experience – but it reached a new height the other day as I was taken back to that childhood experience of mine.

                I ride the bus – I’m that man that stands at the bus stop looking poor and cold. And I was standing outside waiting for my bus the other morning, as a sweet, little family drove by – reminding me a bit of my homeschooled family of the past. I thought about them – I bet they were Christians, they had that spirit about them, they looked well-dressed, their kids well-taken-care-of – I bet they even homeschooled. These thoughts were spinning through my head as this family pulled up to the stop-sign next to my bus stop. I wanted to give them a smile, maybe even wave – but my excited eyes were met with cold, judgmental stares. The children gawked at me as if I were some creature; the mother seemed too frightened to even look my direction! And finally, the father of this well-meaning family met my eyes with a cold stare that said, “Stay away from my family, you creep,” and then he did the inevitable – click – locked doors.

                I was shocked. Hurt, even. They drove off leaving a trail of judgment that made me ashamed to be a Christian! I knew who I was! I certainly had no intentions of harming them. I know that the father of this little family was just trying to protect his wife and kids, but he, in this process, brought what I would deem an unnecessary act of separation between his safe, Christian world and me! Did I really look that frightening? Was it just because I stand at a bus stop in the ghetto? I don’t even think my part of town is that bad… If I didn’t have confidence in who I was in Jesus, I would even be tempted to feel ashamed of myself, my neighborhood – to feel undeserving of anyone who lives a lifestyle that is nicer than the lifestyle that I live! Or maybe just to feel that they don’t want to have anything to do with me – they don’t care about my own world, my own struggles. What if I ran into them in a church building? Could I introduce myself as “the guy you locked out of your car” – would I be less scary in their safe, church environment? Would I even want to stay at such a place? Yes, this small, insignificant action made me feel this way…

                I don’t deem to accomplish anything profound through this blog post. I don’t even mean to condemn those who lock their doors in the ghetto. I just want us to remember our perspectives may not always be right. Jesus told his disciples they would be blessed when the “clothed him when he was naked, fed him when he was hungry, and gave him drink when he was thirsty,” they were dumbfounded, “when have we seen you, Jesus, in any of these states of desperation!?” “Surely,” Jesus said, “Even as you have done it unto the least of these brethren, you have done it unto me.”

                Let us remember we constantly carry the presence of Jesus and the church with us wherever we go. Locking out a poor, hungry person from our car may as well be locking them out of our lives, the life of the church, and maybe even the life of Jesus. I’m not beseeching you to do something crazy, but I’m asking you to remember that those people on the side of the road may actually be Jesus… or me! And the actions and attitudes you show and have towards them may not only impact their eternity, but the blessing you receive from Jesus as well.

                And please, don’t lock me out.   

Glorious Death

“We have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellency of the power may be of God, and not of us.”  -2 Corinthians 4:7

I hardly know where to begin this thought – the beauty of death. The glory of what is revealed into our spirits should we put to death that which is of our flesh. There is so much talk of this concept in Christianity, but so little amount of people that applicably display such a lifestyle as Paul described when he wrote that he was, “Always bearing about in the body the dying of the Lord Jesus, that the life also of Jesus might be made manifest in our body.”

Paul wrote again and again to the Corinthian church about a very touchy subject within the church: Carnal Christians. These are those of us who have been born again, but live in their old man; those who have received the Spirit of God, but walk according to their own mind, will, and emotions. The Word of God was given to us that it may “divide soul and spirit,” that there may be no confusion in what is of God and what is of our Flesh (that is our mind, emotions, soul, and body).

I do not deem that it is necessary to explain the concept of “dying to self” that has been so exalted within the teachings of most of the Church. Denying self is a concept that thousands of people accept – Christians, Buddhists, Hindus, Muslims and even Agnostics understand the importance of the death of our own desires that life may be given to another area. If there is some confusion around this concept, I would encourage reading Paul’s letters to the Corinthians – and listen for his rebukes against self and his exhortations to pursue spiritual life.

Having said this, my desire is to bring up those areas in which I was ignorant of my own self-destruction prior to the enlightening of the Holy Spirit. Let us not be deceived – self cannot serve God. The Almighty Creator of the Universe, although All-Powerful, has no desire of empowering your flesh to serve God! Jesus died on the cross, and with Him, our flesh also died! In the resurrection, the Father did not give life to our dead souls; God forbid lest we be forever trapped in this body of sin! Rather, God gave life to our spirits inside of us, that our souls would submit to the direction of His Spirit so that we could actually follow God!

Something the Lord recently enlightened me of was my own inability to serve Him. How often have I caught myself teaching because I have the ability in my flesh to explain concepts, reasoning over scripture because I’m good at analytical thinking, ministering to a certain type of people group because I relate well to them, leading worship because I’m good at guitar! Woe is me! How often do I teach in the flesh instead of imparting the life-giving Word of God through the power of the Spirit under his control? How often do I read the Bible without begging for the Spirit to bring interpretation to me? How often do I witness or refuse to speak because of my own feelings of comfort and fear? How often do I praise God out of my emotions or my logic instead of worshipping Him in Spirit and in Truth!

We attempt to process so much of what is spiritual through the means of that which is carnal; and although many of us may experience good things, we fail to experience God things! We go on throughout our daily lives and instead of bearing about the death of Jesus to our souls, we live, move, eat, and breathe according to our souls, not according to our Spirits! And yet, even as I write this – many believers will feel convicted in their spirits, yet conduct numerous scenarios in their minds of how they may overcome carnality! How truly wicked are we! How deep and indebted in our sin have we become! Let us humble ourselves, let us submit to the Spirit of promise, let us be free from the captivity of carnality and experience the free life of the Spirit!

Shall we reach a lost world for Christ? Shall we impart life to those who are dying? Shall we lead lives of holiness and righteousness before God? Let us die to our emotions, and live according to the truth of God! Let us lay down our logic and reasoning and experience the intimacy with the Spirit in our decision making! Let us place aside our self, our people-pleasing, and our comforts and embrace the death and life of Jesus that we impart the same life we have received! For them that will hear, let them hear the good news of Jesus.

Violent Missionaries

"And from the days of John the Baptist until now the kingdom of heaven suffereth violence, and the violent take it by force." -Matthew 11:12

This passage, these words, spoken by the Son of God, were not a call to violent arms, but violent living; not offensive strategy, but unrelenting love. John the Baptist, who gained this 'violent' title, was a man who violently opposed his fleshly lusts and violently loved the Lord. He opposed that dreaded nature of man that so often drags humans down, choosing instead to take affliction towards his body and soul that he would be worthy of being a forerunner for the coming Kingdom.

Jesus said of John, "Truly, there is none that are born of women that are greater than John the Baptist; however, he that is least in the kingdom of heaven is greater than he." Since this time, many monks, preachers, pastors, apostles, priests and thousands of believers have pondered what exactly it means to live in this way that John lived - how to be least in the kingdom of heaven. Some have forsaken all to dedicate their lives to fasting and prayer; others to the ministry of the poor and hungry; still others have gone off and started great movements of the gospel that has transcended generations. However, there is a countless majority that had a desire, whether soulish or spiritual, and never quite made the connection to see God move in such a way that it deeply impacted this world for Christ. For some, the issue was simply their lack of motivation and perseverance, or maybe it was due to selfish motivations from which their ministries arose - but there are those of us who have not actually realized the applicable truth of Jesus' promises.

I do not claim to have obtained understanding of full reality of Jesus' promises; however, I do want to share what I have learned in this journey of learning what it means to be "least" in the kingdom of heaven and to live "violently" for Christ. I would beg of you - do not attempt to mimic those things which have worked for me - test my words. "Wisdom is justified of her children," Matthew 11:19. The kingdom of heaven is not a list of to-do's, though it does require obedience. It is a spiritual kingdom requiring a spiritual life guided by the truth of the Word of God. It requires submission of our mind, will, and emotions to a governing Spirit - God's Holy Spirit.

This being said - how does what Jesus said about the kingdom suffering violence relate to missional living?

Reaching the lost is never easy, although it is much simpler a task than we, as Christians, tend to make it. However, one key that is required to be make a large impact in the kingdom is humility. Humility to actually submit ourselves to lost people. My wife and I have begun trying different strategies in order to reach the lost based on living violently in submission to the Spirit and to others. These tactics are not so much "to-do's" as they are attitude changes within us.

I will start with this statement: How difficult it is to reach out to lost people when we separate ourselves from the world in pride! The very act of church has turned into more of a social club for "better" people that often intimidates, humiliates, and even attacks many of the lost people Jesus died for! "Christian" music, "Christian" friends, "Christian" neighborhoods - all of these have the intent of glorifying God, but actually have a harmful affect on His Kingdom. The Lord never intended to take us out of the junk of this world - that's why we're here! He said in John 17 that he "would not take us out of the world." Why has Christian society attempted to do that which Jesus intended not to do? To separate ourselves? To form what we believe are little slices of heaven where sin is cast away and children can grow up uncorrupted? Jesus prayed that God would keep us from evil in the midst of the world - do we so much doubt God's ability to protect his children that we must homeschool, private school, and churchify our families? These tactics of protecting ourselves from evil are not biblical, nor are they good, they are based out of human knowledge and tactics based in fear and pride that actually demonstrate a lack of trust in the truth of God's Word.

Let us be careful that we do not misinterpret what the Word says – there is only one interpretation, that is that of the Holy Spirit. Our intellect cannot interpret or form strategies based out of scripture no matter how hard we try – to experience what God intended for us in this life, we actually need to place our full faith in what the Word of God says. When Adam and Eve sinned in the garden, it was not because they ate of the fruit that gave them a knowledge of evil, it was because it gave them knowledge of the capability of their soul. It cut off dependence from God, exalted their souls – their mind and emotions – above their spirits and cut off precious fellowship with the Lord! It is the pride of believing we can provide what God has promised outside of God's timing, Will, and Word when we sin. Do not be deceived, when the flesh, that is your soul, is attempting to serve God and do His Will, sin is magnified. You cannot serve God with your un-regenerated self, you need to live into the new life in the new man given by his quickening Spirit and the new identity that this reality brings. Jesus rebuked the Pharisees for calling him good, “Only the Father is good,” he replied. Jesus understood that his spirit must be dependent and submissive the that which is good, for there is “nothing good” in our souls – our hearts are deceitfully wicked and must be put to death so that our Spirits may be quickened to experience that reality of what Jesus promised us!

This is the violent part. This is the dying to self and the humility that must be realized in our hearts to live out faith in Jesus. It is this – and it is so much more. It is walking in new life in the Spirit and following Jesus in faith! Our identities in Jesus are a required realization that must take place if we are to experience the reality of what God intended for our lives on mission. It is the relationship with Jesus based out of death to self, violent faith, and humble submission that starts the engine that moves the vehicle of the kingdom.

Humility is required to understand our identity, and our identity is key to reaching out with the gospel of Jesus to a lost and dying world. Jesus told his followers in Matthew 5, “You are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid.” This was not a suggestion. Nor was this a “work and obtain this title” type of word. This was, this is, a “you are” statement! Your identity in Jesus states that you are the light of the world! This truth can only be a reality in our spirits, though. Our old, dead self cannot receive the new truth of our identity promised to our quickened spirits! In humility, we must embrace this truth and walk in the communion of the Holy Spirit and listen to the quiet direction He brings to allow this identity truth to come out.

Practically speaking, a major part of humility is faith. Two separate verses that talk about pleasing God say these things “without faith it is impossible to please God” and a “broken and contrite heart, Oh God, thou wilt not despise.” In order to receive in humility what God says about my new man positionally requires that I place myself in situations where His promises must be true!

If we truly are the light of the world, we must receive this truth in humility and place ourselves in a position where we can, by faith, experience this reality! Separation from the world will not allow you to receive the promise of being the light of the world. Missionally speaking, a light is only light in a dark place – a city sat on a hill is only noticeable in a pit. To reach a dying world, you must continually jump into it in faith, believing God can protect you from evil and draw the lost to His son by His promises spoken over your spirit!

Strategy will not reach a dying world – maybe a person or two – but to actually transmit the life-giving love of Jesus, we must actually be dependent on this life through the Holy Spirit. Any dependency on our human flesh, our knowledge, our own soul's good will actually fail and fall short of God's perfect Will. God wants to reach the lost, and he wants to reach them through you – but He wants you to do so through submission to His Spirit and faith in His promises.

Practically, my wife and I are trying to jump into this truth. We fall short. We depend on our soul when we should lean on the Spirit. But we are trying to place ourselves in a place where God's truth needs to be true, where our souls are uncomfortable, where only dependency on the Spirit can bring about the results we desire – more importantly, that God desires. This journey is new for us, and the fruit is still young – but we are actually engaging God in our spirits, and even engaging lost people we previously questioned if we could reach simply by placing ourselves in “dark” places and letting the promise of God's light shine through our dependency on Him! How amazing it is when the reality of God's promises transcend into the natural!

Let us be careful to heed the words of Jesus in Matthew 11:

“For John came neither eating nor drinking, and they say, He hath a devil. The Son of man came eating and drinking, and they say, Behold a man gluttonous, and a winebibber, a friend of publicans and sinners. But wisdom is justified of her children.”

When one chooses to afflict to soul, to seek after the Spirit, and to live as a light in the midst of the darkness of the world, the religious will oppose you – your own religious spirit inside of you may oppose you! But true violent living and missional living contains a blessing from Jesus – and the fruit of what is done in the Will of God will last forever. Wisdom is indeed justified of her children – the wisdom of this world in failure, the wisdom of God in success. Consider this exhortation, and pray that the Spirit of God will enlighten your heart to understand His intentions. May all that we do be guided by the Spirit and done in humility. And may the eyes of every reader be blessed to see destiny, their ears to hear direction, and their hearts to experience the truth of God's Word. Amen.

Giving Up, Letting Go, and Hanging On

I've had a wonderful opportunity lately to work in a nursery on a consistent basis with a pretty large group of kids under the age of four. I've really grown to love them... but when they start to get fussy or throw fits over things, and then refuse my advice or comfort... it can be kind of frustrating. It's the simple lessons of giving up, letting go, and hanging on that they just can't seem to get: "In order to get a cool, new toy you want to play with, you may have to let go of the one you're playing with now; I know you want to start the TV, but why don't you let go of the remote you don't know how to use, and let me do it for you; if you really want to make a basket in the goal, you have to try more than twice..."
Obviously, these are just a few examples... but you get the gist of it. But a funny thing happened the other night while I was thinking about these kids: God told me that I'm one of them! I had this dream:

I was playing nerf-gun wars with a few friends of mine in this city-like area. The rules were simple: If you get hit three times, you're out. So we started playing, running around and shooting at each other. Before I knew it, I had two hits on me. Someone began chasing me trying to get my one last hit in order to eliminate me from play. So I took off running - through streets, over cars, in and out of buildings... until I reached this green pasture area and tripped, rolling down a hill. My buddy was coming down after me ready to get the last hit on me, so I quickly turned and started shooting just as they began to shoot at me. But suddenly, we weren't shooting darts anymore - our guns had turned into water guns! We continued firing at one another and soaking each other until a voice said, "It's no longer about winning or losing, it's about who gives up first."

Now, from a glance... this just sounds like a silly dream. But I woke up knowing there was some substance to it, and this is what God has been pressing on my heart for a while. Take a look at this passage of scripture with me:

"Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus. Let us therefore, as many as be perfect, be thus minded: and if in any thing ye be otherwise minded, God shall reveal even this unto you." -Philippians 3:13-15

Paul wrote this letter with the intent of getting the believer's mindset right. For Paul, it wasn't about a physical achievement, it was about their heart attitude. He encourages them in this passage to "be thus minded" - not to act this way... to "be thus minded."

So how does all this tie together?

Well, there's three things:
1. It's not about winning or losing, it's about who gives up first.
2. We, as Christians, are little kids. We don't know what to give up, let go, or hang on to.
3. This is a mindset change that pushes us towards our destiny.

So let's start with number one! What on earth does that dream mean?

Well, at the beginning of my dream, success was measured in a very attainable way. Basically, three strikes and your out! Sadly, many Christians live their spiritual lives in a similar way. We so often use our carnal minds to try to discern spiritual things that we try to use worldly goals to reach heavenly prizes, and it just doesn't work like that! We often have this "checklist" mentality that enables us to make spiritual growth a series of achievements. The big problem with this, is that it erases grace, enables men to reach perfection, and disallows the work of the Spirit! And that's a BIG PROBLEM!

If loving my neighbor becomes a task, it means that I can somehow either succeed or fail at doing that task. However, the Bible tells us that we are saved, not by our works of righteousness, but by his grace! I think its safe to say that our "heavenly calling," also mentioned in Ephesians three, takes more emphasis on God's grace completing us than our "righteous acts" fulfilling our destiny. And if our  own righteous acts can get us to maturity, what's the need for the Spirit? The bottom line is this: "Spiritual Maturity" really isn't something we obtain, it's something we pursue.

Another part of my dream I didn't mention had me set in a foreign mission field trying to use carnal tactics to reach the lost for Christ. It wasn't working. God then used this seemingly silly analogy to teach me about what Spiritual Maturity and Spiritual Success is really defined by:
"It's not about winning or losing, it's about who gives up first."
Or the amplified version:
"It's not about obtaining or falling short, it's about giving up, letting go, and hanging on to the right things."

So what's with giving up, letting go, and hanging on? How do they relate to Spiritual Maturity and Success?

Well, Paul talks about these three very important concepts in the passage in Philippians 3: He does not count himself to have apprehended; he forgets the things behind him; and he presses forward to things in front of him. Paul tells us that this is the mindset of a mature, success-driven believer!

But the problem is, we don't know how to give up, let go, or hang on.
You see,

I don't want to give up my past life, my sins, my struggles, my pride, my "achievements." I don't want to really lose my life in order to gain whatever Christ wants to give me. I don't want to give up this toy for the cooler toy Jesus is offering me! Can't I have both?

And I really don't want to let go of my ministry, my life. God, you don't understand. I know you created me and all, but I think I should be holding the remote.

And why should I keep trying something that's so hard? Why should I keep pressing towards a life of holiness? Of godliness? I tried that. I missed my shots. I'll go back to my old games now.


But this isn't the mindset the Bible teaches us at all! Paul was a very "successful" Christian. He could say the he "achieved" spiritual knowledge, he could have basked in the fact that he had started so many churches, and he could have talked himself out of pursuing more ministry since he had so much on his plate already! But instead, Paul called himself the chief of sinners and was constantly pursuing fresh revelation; he didn't focus on what was done, but what needed to be done; and he fixed his eyes on God's will and not his own plans.

Brothers and Sisters, this is such an important concept. If we don't learn how to do this properly, we stunt our growth, hurt the body, and lose heavenly rewards. It's not worth that to hold onto our pride! We need to learn to give up our ideas of perfection, let go of our life plans, and press forward in faith for what God has in store! This is the path to Spiritual Maturity - realizing it doesn't end. Realizing we don't attain it. Realizing that following God is a life-long journey that isn't about winning or losing, it's about giving up!

So let's all give up our worldly pursuits in favor of heavenly rewards! Let's give up, let go, and hang on to the things God would have us to, and let's experience the growth and success of living a life according to the Spirit.

And Lord, enable me with your grace to discern if there is "anything in which I am otherwise minded" that you may mold me according to your Will in the name of Jesus!

Judgement and Shaking

After spending some time in prayer about this, I feel like it's time that I share something God has been showing me over the past few months. The message is simple: judgement is coming. However, I've had some fairly specific ways that God has shown me these things, and I wouldn't necessarily be one to jump and down to get attention and share it - but the things have been coming to pass, and I feel like it's time to put them out there.

While I've been feeling for a while that judgement was on the brink - as I believe most of us believe these days - my true conversion to the "judgement-is-nigh" side didn't really happen until March 6th, 2011. I woke up at about 4 AM and started undergoing some intense spiritual attack. It's hard to explain except that I felt every lie I've ever fought in my entire life was trying to hit me all at once. I prayed in the Spirit until I fell back asleep about an hour later. Sometime during my sleep, I had this dream:

I was sitting three rows back, three rows over of what appeared to be a small, underground church meeting with various church leaders that I knew of. We were all praying and worshiping together when my eyes locked with another leader's eyes. Immediately, his eyes began flashing various dots and dashes at me in a very specific order. Upon waking up, the Spirit immediately told me a few things: the dashes and dots are Morse code, the three seats back is three years, and the three seats over is three stages. I quickly got my computer and figured out what the Morse code meant. It ended up being a reference to a Bible passage: Ezekiel 7:3, "Now is the end come upon thee, and I will send mine anger upon thee, and will judge thee according to thy ways, and will recompense upon thee all thine abominations." After reading the rest of the passage, I was so filled with awe over the Lord, that I collapsed. My heart broke over my country and I fell to my knees in tears. Three months! That's June of 2011! Lord, give me clarification. Help me to understand.

I pondered this dream in my heart and shared it with a few close people for the next while. A couple weeks later, I had another dream on March 19th, 2011 in Cedar Rapids.

The dream was very specific. There would be an order to a series of earthquakes that was going to hit the United States. My dream started with a map focused on the Central United States around the St. Louis area, I saw an earthquake happen at this location. Shortly after, the map zoomed out and I saw two other earthquakes take place - one around Colorado, and another around the East Coast. These earthquakes happened almost simultaneously.

This dream combined with my other dream lead me to believe that these earthquakes would happen on June, 7th of 2011. I prayed about this date and asked for further clarification. The night of June 6th, 2011 - I had one more dream about everything.

And then I saw myself standing before a car. And the car's name was Judgement. The hood of the car was open and the Lord God said to me: Pour the oil inside the car, but pour only one-quarter of the oil. And so I did so. And then the Lord God said again: Pour the oil inside the car, put pour only half of the bottle. Again, I obeyed the voice. Then the Lord God said again: Pour all the oil inside the car. For the third year has come to pass that my judgement will be fulfilled upon this place, and my vehicle of Judgement will travel the nation because they have not heard my voice. And so immediately I was in the car called "Judgement," and I was riding through the country that was the United States. First, I saw that many small towns and businesses had been abandoned because of great economic difficulties. Next, I saw that great storms and tornadoes were heading across the United States. Specifically, I saw a storm that was traveling through New York so "that I may wake up and know this dream has come from the Lord." Finally, I was driven into a courthouse, where I saw the falling of the freedom in America and a new door open to persecution. All these thing were supposed to happen gradually over a period of three years, until in 2015, things were utterly unrecognizable as America. 

I woke up from this dream knowing that the judgement signs would be gradual, but I still expected to see the things come to pass. First, I saw the storm on June 7th, 2011 that went through New York City. Second, on June 7th, 2011 there was the first small earthquake my first and second dreams predicted on the New Madrid Fault line. Then again, on August 23rd, a nearly simultaneous earthquake happened that shook near Washington DC and Colorado. Just like my second dream had said. While all these things: the economy, natural disasters, and government changes have been subtle, they have been coming to pass. And coming exactly as the Lord has shown me. I don't say these things claiming to be anybody, but I say them saying the Lord has fulfilled a word he showed me, and I feel it is a responsibility of mine to share those words with others.

One other important dream I had the other day was this:

I was walking along a long dirt road, where I again saw the signs of judgement. Fallen governments, huge storms, and economic disaster. However, the people I was with refused to recognize these signs as judgement from the Lord. Instead, the put up a little "display shelter" where a great geyser loomed over the city in a seemingly harmless fashion. Above the geyser, the people inscribed, "The Great Judgement" as a mockery of how "great" the judgement was. The Lord God told me in my dream, go over near my judgement. As I did, a huge blast of water from the geyser blew me off my feet and left me in a state of disarray. The Lord warned me, "The signs have been given, do not ignore. My judgement is coming. People will say "it is slow," but when it comes, it will come quickly. (Much like the message in Habakkuk 2:1-3). We are warned in the Bible, people will say, "Peace and safety, and then sudden destruction will come upon them." Just be ready. Be ready.

I do not say these things to scare you, nor spur you into some kind of year-2k type thinking where you store up 20 years worth of canned food. I say these things to warn you of what is to come so that your faith will remain strong, and so that you will draw nigh unto God during these difficult times that we're entering into as a nation. My opinion is not fact, it is speculative. I don't have perfect understanding, but God has shown me some very specific things that have come to pass - and I would warn others that judgement really is coming, and coming soon. And that we should prepare ourselves for the things the Lord has in store for our country.

Go and be blessed in Jesus' Holy Name.

Monuments: Healing

"And these signs shall follow them that believe... they shall lay hands on the sick, and they shall recover." -Mark 16:17-18

It truly is amazing how the Lord heals! I am always amazed at the way that God chooses to heal his beloved! No longer surprised that he does, but still amazed by the way he does it. I've been blessed to be a the example of the "one who lays on hands" and one who "has hands laid on him." I've seen God do some amazing healings over the last few years of my life, and these just happen to be some of my favorite stories. I hope you are edified and that your faith is encouraged! 

The Prophet Runs

At the beginning of my sophomore year of high school, I was having some really bad knee problems that were consistently getting worse. I was upset at how much pain I was in and how weak my knee was getting. Finally, after about a month of intense knee-pain, I went to the Lord in deep intercession and begged him to restore the health of my knee.

That night, the Lord gave me an incredible dream. "I saw myself standing underneath a wooden shelter situated on a long, dirt road. I was meandering about without much sense of purpose or direction. Out of the desert, a man came up to me and began talking to me about the Lord. Finally, with a sense of urgency - he told me to run. RUN! RUN! He said. I took off like there was an army after me running down this long, dirt road. Suddenly, I stopped and looked back at this mysterious man who began to announce me as "the prophet of the Lord." Then he began shouting, 'Behold! The prophet runs! Behold, the prophet of the Lord runs!'"

I woke up from this dream with the same sense of urgency that I needed to start running. I jumped out of my bed and darted out into the hall way. It took me almost a minute to realize what was happening: I was running! My knee felt no pain and wasn't collapsing! It was full of strength and health! I ran around my house jumping and bending my knee in celebration of God's healing power! The Lord truly does heal!

However, my knee problems didn't end there. Two years later, I still felt the gradual pain in the side of my right knee every once-and-a-while. I was spending some time in Cedar Rapids, Iowa with some house church friends and they wanted to pray over me before I left. In the middle of the prayer time, one of the women in group stood up and said, "I saw a picture of you running down this long dirt road... you're running and you're growing weary. But the Lord is telling you to keep running! And I see two angels coming along either side of you to nourish and strengthen you. And I see you having pain in your right knee. And one of the angels is reaching down and touching this knee, and giving you a tendon of gold. " 

How broken I was as she began to tell me a similar vision to the dream I had been given over two years before. The dirt road. The call to run. The accuracy of my pain. The right leg... everything! After she told me her vision and I announced its accuracy with the pain I had felt in the past. The church prayed for my leg together, and the Lord completely healed it! Never once from that day forward did I feel that sharp pain in my leg ever again! Glory to Jesus!

Peace that Passes Understanding

I had been back from China for only about six months - but these six months had been some of the worst of my life. A gradual, detrimental illness began eating away at my body and mind. "Idiopathic, peripheral neuropathy" - doctor for "we don't know why, but it's shutting your body down." My mind was so eaten away at, that I finally had to be put into a mental hospital for my own stability sake. 

I knew I was on the verge of dying. I didn't feel much will to live because of what intense pain I felt 24/7. But the Spirit of the Lord gave me a glimmer of hope even in my darkest times. The Bible says that faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the Word of God! And this testimony is a tribute to that verse! In my desperation, I began searching the scriptures until I came across the Philippians 4 concept of "peace that passes understanding." I began to pray, read, meditate, speak and live that passage out. I mulled over that verse until it became a reality in my life.

The curing properties of this verse quickly began to reverse the affect of the mental pain all the way back to my body's functions. Not only did my mind heal and allow for clearer thinking, but my body healed back to where I could walk and move like a normal human being in just a couple months! I should have died from that illness, but the meditation upon God's Word transformed my mind and even my body into what God had planned for it to be like! Glory to Jesus!

 

That Demon Pharmecia

There are many miraculous stories wrapped around a two-year period of my life where I was leading a house church/Bible study out of my garage for teenagers. Many of the guys were ex-gang members, drug addicts, or involved in lascivious sexual behavior. In this instance, a guy came that was addicted to marijuana. He had been coming off and on for quite a while, and really had a good heart to follow the Lord. He had been walking out his faith pretty well, but made a mistake and ended up smoking a few joints. 

Towards the end of the evening, he began to confess this sin and talk about how he needed to be able to pass a drug test the next day in order to get a job! Big problem considering marijuana stays in your system for 30+ days, and he had smoked just a few days before. Thankfully, I had a mentor that had come to the group that night to give a testimony, and he knew what to do with this situation.

We all got around this friend of mine and laid hands on him. We began to start interceding for him while my mentor began to talk to him. With a gentle, yet commanding, authority - my mentor said that this demon, "Pharmecia," was not allowed. He rebuked the influence of drugs and the affect of drugs over my friends life. My friend began to get dizzy and looked as if there was some intense battle going on inside of him. Suddenly, he began to vomit black, marijuana out of his lungs! He threw up for probably 2 minutes while the whole group stood their in awe of God's healing power! 

Truly enough, this friend of mine passed the drug test the next day without a trace of the drug in his body! Not only that, but he is now walking in righteousness and a life free from drugs - serving and following the Lord with his whole heart! Amen! 

Stomach and Back

Ever since I was a little kid, I had suffered from random periods of intense stomach pain. They were much more frequent than the average "stomach ache" an individual may get - and the doctor's even seemed to think they might have known what was wrong with me. Thankfully, the Lord never gave them that opportunity.

This stomach pain was accompanied my junior year of high school with an intense back pain as well. From the time I had been sick my sophomore year of high school, the pain I felt in my back had never fully subsided. But again, God had a plan for eliminating this suffering.

I had taken a trip up to this IHOP (International House of Prayer) service called "The Awakening." I only went a few times over the months that it was running - but was touched by what the Lord did during that time. I happened to be there one night when many people were getting healed - healed from drug addiction, from illnesses, from lameness, from deafness, from bad eye-sight... you name it. I was making it a focus of mine to spend time praying for others during this night of great healing - walking around and laying hands on those whom the Lord was leading for me to pray.

This healing had to be one of the most simple and pure healings I have ever witnessed. I was walking through the crowd that filled up IHOP-U's student building, when a little boy walked up to me and locked eyes with me. He couldn't have been more than 10 years old, but the purity in his eyes kept me fixed into his gaze. Suddenly, with childlike faith, he placed his hand on my stomach - not saying a single word - and sent what felt like fire straight into my gut. This fire ran into my gut, up my esophagus, through my whole shoulders/back/sides/ribs - everything! Until the fire had practically consumed me! And all this time, my eyes were continually fixed with this little boy. He probably only held his hand there for 15 seconds - but it felt like hours as I felt the Lord doing a transforming work on my insides. Then, without so much as a "In Jesus Name" or the typical IHOP phrase, "More!" The boy just walked away and disappeared into the crowd. After that moment, I never again struggled with those pains the same way - I had been healed with purity in Jesus' name!

Sleep Deprivation 

These last three testimonies also took place at my little teenage house church towards the end of my time in high school. On this specific night, we had attracted the attention of a boy who was struggling with homosexuality, Satanism, and drugs. He seemed to jump right in to the group, and enjoyed talking about the Lord and about the Bible. But at the end of the study, he pulled me aside and told me a struggle he'd been having.

I was expecting something about the sex, drugs, or demons - but he simply told me "I haven't been able to sleep for a week." Wow! I was blown away. Here was a kid trapped in what we consider some of the most horrible of sins, and he was asking the Christian guy to help him with his sleep issues! I couldn't believe the opportunity I had. I probably had a thousand answers running through my mind about demonic torture and the need for peace that comes from Jesus - but in my moment of thinking, the Holy Spirit kicked in with some words of his own.

I love those times when you are giving advice or preaching, and suddenly it's like you're listening to something God is saying through you instead of thinking the thoughts and then speaking them. This one of those times. I looked the kid in the eyes and told him, "Tonight, you will sleep. Jesus has given you rest. But for the rest of the week you will again find no rest as a testimony to the power of God!" I couldn't believe what I was saying. I almost wanted to reach out and grab those words back! 'What if that's not true!?' I was thinking. The kid seemed equally surprised, and just kind of took what I said and left. 

The next week, the kid saw me outside of the high school we went to and came running up to talk to me. "Josh! You won't believe what happened. I slept that night! All through it. The one you told me at least. But since that day, I wasn't able to sleep at all! Just like you said! Will you pray for me again?" WOW! Truly God did something only God can do in this situation! What a tribute to the power and omnipotence of our Lord!

Fading Arthritis

The evening of this particular story was simply meant to be prayer meeting. I had invited a couple of guys over to pray and seek the Lord with me. When one guy showed up, he had casts on each of his wrists. He told me about how he had been to the doctor earlier that day and was diagnosed with severe arthritis because of the strain his job was putting on his hands. I wanted to pray for him right away, but the Lord put a check on my mouth and said to wait. 

We entered a time of intercession, and the Lord had me walk around the room, shaking my hands, praying for the loosing of "physical chains" - and he probably had me do this for 45 minutes! Pray, pray, pray. That's what we did. I had no idea what the other guys had going on in their hearts, but the more I prayed, the more excited I got! I felt like chains were falling off of my wrists! I felt the Lord come and place some ounce of the Spirit on my fingers and gird me with strength I didn't even need! I can't explain the feeling outside of it feeling like God had chosen my hand as a temporary habitation! 

Suddenly, he told me to go grab the guy's wrists that had arthritis. Everything began to make sense. I needed to break off those chains that had bound his wrists under that stupid curse - that ugly sin! I ran over to him and grabbed his wrists, and lifted them in the air towards heaven. I didn't say a thing. There was no need to. It felt to both of us as if fire was running from my body into his, and he could feel the chains of arthritis melting away from his wrists. Praise the Lord! Two weeks later, there wasn't a trace of arthritis to be found! Not even the doctor could find it! Hallelujah!

Moving Bones

This last story is probably one of the most powerful stories I've ever had a chance to witness. Simply God's transforming power - both in the physical and spiritual realms - will never cease to amaze me. This testimony took place near the end of the time I was leading the little house church with the teenage guys. We were holding one last big "BOB Bash" - basically, an outreach concert. While the heavy-metal/screamo sound definitely doesn't get me into a worship mode, the majority of the guys I worked with were really into that type of music. Needless to say, that type of music and dancing can always be a precursor to various injuries.  


Towards the end of the show, one of the band members for the last heavy-metal band broke his arm while swinging his instrument around. All I remember was hearing a loud CRASH and seeing this member run off of the stage. Everyone suddenly rushed back to see what was going on with the guy, people began praying for him, and this band member crawled up on the ground in intense agony over his hurting arm. After they prayed for him, the band went back on the stage to finish the show, while myself and a few other guys walked the hurting band member outside of the main auditorium.


We took him into a hall outside of the main room, laid hands on him, and started praying in the Spirit. I was begging the Lord to do a miracle to show all the non-believers the power of the Lord. After a couple minutes of prayer, I felt the Holy Spirit tell me to take my right hand and put it on his hurting arm. At first, seeing his pain, I was hesitant. But I finally obeyed in full faith that God was going to do something. What happened next was truly amazing. Once my hand was on his arm, I could feel that one of his bones was not in the right place - something had been bent way out of whack. But the moment I put my hand on that broken bone, I began to feel shifting in his arm - things were moving! A second later, the hurting band member dropped to floor in some of the most intense pain he felt all night. But glory to Jesus, this only lasted for a minute! The Holy Spirit MOVED that bone back into place, and this victim started bending his arm and crying at the goodness of the Lord!


After everything was over, the member paralleled the healing to a healing that was going on in his heart. About how he had felt like he was drifting from the Lord, but this healing was a sign of God's unconventional love and transforming power. He rededicated his life to the Lord, along with at least twenty other people that night, and received not only a healing of his arm, but a healing of his heart. Glory to Jesus. Amen.